 RESPITE CARE OF
SAN ANTONIO
It’s a home away from home for children
with special needs
Written by KAREN KOLIVOSKY
Photography by JEFFREY TRUITT
Bert Pfiester recalls one of the defining moments in his transformation into a caregiver for children with special needs.
Six-month-old triplets arrived at Respite Care of San Antonio after leaving an abusive home. When the infants grew fussy in unison, a motherly staff member held one in each arm. Pfiester, three months into his role as the program’s new executive director and in his first job working with children, gingerly jiggled the carrier of the third crying child.|
The woman watched for a moment, then gave her new boss a direct order. “Pick the child up!” she said. He did.
Six years later, Pfiester knows when to pick a child up. Along with the rest of the staff, he knows how to comfort children who come to Respite Care in state custody, always following a traumatic experience, often after being taken from their mothers’ arms.
Respite Care started 20 years ago as a way to give much-needed breaks to the parents of children with special needs. While it still provides that service to families, necessity has transformed the center into an emergency shelter for children who are removed from abusive or neglectful homes.
The stately mansion in San Antonio’s historic Monte Vista neighborhood is the only licensed overnight emergency shelter in Texas that cares for children with special needs. Staff members are specially trained to serve children affected by mental retardation, autism, cystic fibrosis and other conditions.
“We have a great number of kids in need. We as a state, a community, are in crisis,” Pfiester says. “There are just not enough spaces for them.”
Medical care and nursing are provided on site 16 hours a day. If children have suffered injuries or are removed from their mothers at birth because of drug exposure, Respite Care provides the medical care to help them recover.
HELP FOR FAMILIES
In addition to the emergency shelter, the center provides much-needed support to families of children with special needs.
Kimberly Staveley is one of the parents who relies on Respite Care’s services. She’s the single parent of a 4-yearold, a 7-year-old and a 9-year-old. Benjamin, her middle child, has Down syndrome. She discovered Respite Care services when he was six months old, including programs where she could leave all three kids for time to herself.
“It was a welcome relief,” Staveley says. “I can really go take a breather for myself and get recharged. It’s a real blessing to be a mom, and an extra special blessing to be a mom of a special needs child, but I’ve got to have time where I can recharge to keep going.”
Benjamin is one of 65 children enrolled in the day care program. His typically developing sister also attended before enrolling in preschool. The day care serves siblings as an added convenience to parents. About 20 percent of the children there are developing typically.
Medical care and other therapies are provided during day care hours, sparing working parents time-consuming trips to frequent health care appointments.
Staveley, a day care director herself, sees the difference that specialized care is making in Benjamin’s development. She used to take Benjamin to work with her, but noticed that the fast-paced environment would overstimulate and frustrate him at times.
“He’s a much happier person,” says Staveley. “It’s easier for him to transition home after being at the day care because they keep it so calm.”
At Respite Care, class sizes are smaller, providing extra attention. When children arrive at the day care center after school, workers keep the lights down and create a quiet environment to help the children unwind from the day.
Sliding scale fees keep rates affordable. Roughly 70 percent of families who use the day care have incomes at or below the poverty level, Pfiester says. Most don’t start out that way, but when a child is born with special needs, a twoincome family often loses one income when one parent stays home to care for the child. Medical bills and other expenses add to the burden. “A family that was once stable financially easily becomes unstable,” Pfiester says.
When you have a child with special needs, Pfiester explains, offers of help are few and far between. To give parents a break, Respite Care also offers weekend programs that allow parents to leave their special needs children for date nights or time with their typically developing children.
HOME AWAY FROM HOME
While 90 percent of the center’s beds are devoted to emergency shelter, the center also cares for children whose parents need an extended respite — for example, when an emergency calls the parent away or when she simply needs a longer break. Parents can leave their child for an overnight stay knowing that trained staff will provide the specialized care their child needs.
“We consider this kind of a bed and breakfast for the child to let parents take an extended respite,” Pfiester says.
A mansion on an oversized lot studded with 150-year-old oaks, Respite Care’s main facility, the Davidson House, looks like it could be a vacation getaway.
Inside, painted murals donated by local artists decorate each room. Custom-painted bedroom walls depict treehouse and butterfly motifs. A sunny nursery provides space for up to six infants.
Homespun looks mask safety and practicality. Cozy quilts and colorful bedskirts cover hospital beds. Windows that peer out on giant oaks and the center’s large playground are made of safety glass and sealed shut. Lamps and other furnishings are bolted down.
The children join the staff in the home’s large dining room for three meals a day. For some kids, it’s a new mealtime experience: no television, just familystyle food and conversation.
It’s one way Respite Care creates a child-centered environment, along with reading times, playtimes and field trips. The ultimate goal, Pfiester says, is to show children that “adults don’t hurt, don’t shout, don’t cause harm.”
FOSTER CARE
Children who come to Respite Care in a crisis often stay for three to four months. From there, they move on to a relative’s home if possible, or they enter the foster care system.
In several cases, children left Respite Care for foster homes, only to return when foster families could not deal with the complexities of caring for a child with special needs, despite good intentions.
To help better equip families for the challenges, Respite Care became a licensed foster placement agency in 2006. Typically, foster families have little opportunity to develop a relationship with children until the youngsters arrive at their home. By giving families advance meetings to let them interact with the children, Pfiester hopes for more happy endings.
“We wanted to invite families in to meet the child, play — do something to assess for yourself and your family if it’s right,” Pfiester says. So far Respite Care has licensed three families. “We need many, many more,” he says, while acknowledging that foster families have a tough job. “It’s a tremendous job, a tremendous commitment that a
family makes.”
Pfiester has a special understanding of the challenges of fostering. He became a foster parent himself, and in August 2007, completed the adoption of three siblings. He first met his children four years ago when they were brought to Respite Care in state custody.
Pfiester’s role as the executive director of a nonprofit is a natural extension of his 25-year career as an executive with SBC Communications, now AT&T. For more than a decade, his job was connecting SBC employees with volunteer opportunities. He gained a familiarity with San Antonio’s nonprofit community and was drawn to it. After retiring, he began to volunteer, doing everything from walking dogs at the Humane Society to fund raising.
When Respite Care’s former executive director, Patty Teeter, was planning to leave, she encouraged Pfiester to apply for the job. He wasn’t looking; he was happy with his volunteering jobs, and the prospect of working with children was daunting. She talked him into volunteering at Respite Care.
After spending a few hours with children at the Davidson House, Teeter walked him to the door. “Have you changed your mind?” she asked. “You know I did,” he told her.
“It’s really more rewarding than I ever had hoped that it would be to be able to watch those first steps of a child, watch a child respond to care that they didn’t have when they first enrolled,” he says. “It’s tremendously rewarding, much more so than I ever anticipated it would be.”
The organization is in the process of expanding. With a gift from the Harvey Najim Family Foundation, the agency purchased a home for special needs children and their siblings across the street from its headquarters. The new home will open in the spring of 2008.
The organization is funded by government grants and the United Way, along with support from local corporations, foundations and individuals. Donations of money are always appreciated, as are diapers of all sizes and gently used clothing for boys and girls from infants to teenagers. The organization also offers volunteer opportunities.
For more information on Respite Care, call (210) 737-1212 or visit respitecaresa.org.
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